I have been away from Kansas for 8 1/2 years now. During those years it has been vital to maintain my relationship with my parents, siblings, friends, etc. On average I talk to someone in my family in some type of way (email, text, phone call) once, twice a day. My brother Zach says, "it's just the way we roll!" It allows for us to all be apart of the little daily activities.
When I first moved away my mom called daily, and always before 8 AM :) Mom is an early riser. I know now why she did it, it gave her a few moments of sanity each morning to sip her coffee and read scripture, uninterrupted. Mornings are still mom's best time of day.
Nearly 6 years ago I noticed that mom was repeating herself a lot during our phone conversations. Retelling stories word for word twice in a 20 minute call. I blew it off but not really. I just read a book "Still Alice" by Lisa Genova, that I encourage EVERYONE to read to better understand what mom is going through and what we as a family are going through, and to better understand Alzheimer's. One of the things that happens to Alice is she stops talking on the phone because it's too confusing to hear a bunch of words and not be able to string it all together. The phone eliminates the ability to watch somebody's body language and use it to help follow a conversation, words all alone with no other senses being stimulated are hard to follow. So about 2 1/2 years ago mom stopped initiating calling me. The great thing is that my dad and her now call together. They put me on speaker phone and it relieves the pressure of mom having to keep a conversation going.. she can pipe in while listening to dad and I talk. Skype has saved our lives. It allows her to see our facial expressions and follow the conversation with much more ease. All this to say about 2 months ago the phone rang and my mom's cell phone number popped up on the caller ID. My heart skipped a beat. I tried to not get too excited convincing myself maybe it was dad calling from her phone.
Me:"Hello?"
Mom: "Hi, honey it's mom! How are you?"
Me, tears rolling down my face: "I'm SO good mom how are you?"
Mom: "Oh, I'm fine. I just wanted you to know that I was thinking about you, Mark, and the kids and I love you! Have a good day. I need to go now!"
Me:"Ok, mom. I love you too!"
30 seconds of total bliss.
If your mother calls, answer the phone. Some of us are waiting on pins and needles to get that phone call you so easily take for granted.
~s
Reading this a little late. That phone conversation brought tears to my eyes. Sara! My heart is with your family...and my prayers. I am so glad for you that your momma called. My mom has clinical depression, and I feel glad when she initiates a phone call, too :)
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