""I, enter into this covenant of marriage with you. I promise to love you, and to completely give myself and all that I have to you. I pledge to care for you in sickness or in health. I will honor and cherish you all the days of my life, whether our life circumstances are better or worse, our days sweet or sour, and whether we have plenty or are in want. I will purpose to live before you a life of faith and trust in Jesus Christ. If anything but death separates me from you, may the Lord deal with me ever so severely."
there are two parts that choke me up every time i read them.
first, "I will honor and cherish you all the days of my life, whether our life circumstances are better or worse"
honor and cherish, these are meaty words, it's why we chose them.
honor means to respect, revere, dignify, and esteem.
cherish means to protect, foster, to hold dear, to care for tenderly, and to cling to fondly.
so in those twelve words the basic message of our promise to each other went something like this; i will chose everyday, until my very last day, to wake up and hold you (your thoughts, your desires, your needs, your preferences) higher than i hold my own. my job is to make you look good. whether we are sitting in the same room or we are thousands of miles apart. my actions, my words, my motivations, my very being as your spouse is to love you in a dignified way.
i am also going to chose everyday, to hold you so close to my heart that the distractions of the mundane, the glitz and glamor this world wants to entice you with, and the distortions of our flesh, will not have room to grow. i will cling to you physically, emotionally, sexually and spiritually, in such a gentle, selfless, and tender way that you will be unable to refuse me. i will resolve to protect the entity of our marriage because i chose you, i choose you, and i will continue to make choosing you an everyday, non-negotiable option.
sounds impossible, right? humanly, it is. not one day, not one hour, have those promises been perfectly kept.
but you should know by now we are not about perfection. that's the beauty of being in a marriage where both people are fueled, filled, and fortified in the grace of Jesus Christ. love covers, lays on, removes as if it never happened, a multitude of sins. when you are empowered to love with that kind of love, then the promise to honor and cherish no longer becomes a desire it becomes reality.
which leads me to my second favorite part of our vows, "I will purpose to live before you a life of faith and trust in Jesus Christ"
if we say with our mouths that we love Jesus, than our spouses should just be dripping with the overflowing fruit of our abiding relationship with the King. the world should know that we love Jesus simply by watching the way we love our spouses. that doesn't mean we just love each other when it's easy, convenient, beneficial, or feels good. it means that even when "the worst" comes knocking on our door and threatens to shred everything that embodies our marriage, we fall on our knees and beg the God of the universe to flood our hearts, our intentions, our very being with HIS UNFAILING LOVE!
i am crazy about my husband. i am so overwhelmed and so humbled when i reflect on our marriage. a marriage that has been fought for with tears, blood, and endless prayer. a marriage that has been built on Jesus, built on forgiveness, and built on the promise that though we do not have it in us to keep the promises we made 11 years ago, the One who indwells us will finish the good work He began in our marriage.
mark adam, you just make everything better.
oh, the deep, deep, inexpressible joy our marriage fills me with!
i love you.
~siba
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