next to crossfit, tough mudder competitions seem to be the growing fitness rage. while i have yet to participate in a tough mudder competition i have competed in a tough mother competition.
i will be the first in line to tell you how much i adore my children. but even more than adoring my children, i ENJOY my children. i think unfortunately, this is becoming a rare sentiment amongst parents of young children. i will also be the first to tell you that without reservation, i am tough mother. and my husband is a tough father. before we even conceived our eldest, mark and i talked endless hours about how our home was NOT going to be a child centered home, rather, family centered. with our relationship with our Jesus at the core, our marriage on the surrounding loop, and our children following...on the edges.
practically speaking, this is what the evolution of family centered living has looked like for the Littlejohns.
day number one of life- welcome to the world precious child!! eat, sleep and be with us all you want.
day number 3- welcome home from the hospital precious child! welcome to your room and your bed, isn't it GRAND!? and welcome to your new eating and sleeping schedule. while, this schedule was not highly regimented; typically changed daily for us, and had TONS of flexibility built in, the underlining tone was that we were going to initiate and determine our children's schedule from the very youngest of ages. again, before katie was ever born we spent hours researching the science behind breast feeding, baby's stomachs, gas patterns, sleep patterns, baby whispering techniques, happiest baby on the block techniques, etc..etc.. really it's very simple patterns that our children need in order to sleep and grow. no, my children were never under weight, never malnourished, and we are emotionally bonded deeply with each of our children and see no signs of them being scarred from our tough mother/tough father approach. yes, our children were amazing eaters, they all slept through the night by 3 months old, and on the whole the were happy and easy babies. yes, God forbid, they were allowed to cry and self soothe for appropriate amounts of time at appropriate ages. we enjoyed our children's infancy because we were equipped with a plan, a family centered plan. and i am pretty sure i would have never had a second child if it wasn't for this plan.
moving on.
right around 4-6 months each of our children attempted to bite the hand that fed them. (now, that was such a modest way of putting it, wasn't it? i didn't say nipple, or aureola, or anything :) and each of them were met with the same yelp from me, followed with a stern, "NO! STOP BITING" and that was the end of that. i didn't hesitate to say the big, bad, "N" word. because really that's exactly what i wanted them to do... STOP BITING ME. while many believe a baby this small has no way of comprehending what such a word means, i am here to tell you, i beg to differ.
6-9 months offered another turning point. inevitably, baby begins to flip over when their diaper is being changed. this was met again with a firm, "NO!" i figure at 9 months old, i had at least 18 more months and 3,000 more diapers to change. it can either be a miserable experience 5 times a day, or it can be an experience full of peace and poopfulness. :)
9-18 months offered the throwing food from the changing table stage, refusing foods he/she didn't like, arching their back when placed in a car seat or grocery buggy. all met with age appropriate tones and corrections, "mom and dad are in charge, you will have one bite of everything on your plate, you will not kick or arch your back when placed in a car seat or buggy. how many times in the life of a child do you have to eat with them, put them in their car seat or grocery cart? thousands upon thousands, why not make it enjoyable by correcting these inevitable things early? not waiting for them to turn two or three when we REALLY see their opinions and defiance come to light.
people are extremely passionate about their child rearing techniques! and i say "hey, it's nice to see people passionate about their children" many people will whole heatedly disagree with us and our "ways!" and that's totally ok. i am just writing about how we have implemented these easy steps which have made a WORLD of difference for us, and i figure why withhold information that could lighten some worn out, broke down, physically, mentally, and spiritually exhausted set of parents?
to be continued...
~s
literature plug "One Tough Mother" by Julie Barnhill
No comments:
Post a Comment