i want to hold your hand

parking lots are a scary place for me sometimes. i can not hold the hand of all four of my children. so instead, i hold anderson in my arms, katie and julia hold hands, and then i find myself continually saying, "lucy, hold my hand!" but in reality it's me saying, "lucy, come over here so i can clamp down onto your pea sized hand, squeeze your fingers til they turn blue, so you can not jolt away from me!" her holding my hand only lasts as long as her whimsical thought lasts. but me, firmly gripping her hand, motivated by the fact that if i let go she could quickly find danger.

sometimes we desire to commune with our Holy God only as long as our whimsical thoughts will allow us to be focused on Him. but He is passionately dedicated to always being near us, pursuing our pea sized and wild hearts, motivated by the fact that if we are without Him our soul is desperately in danger.

i love Him for never letting me go.  i love Him because He WANTS to hold my hand. knowing all that He does about the state of my heart... He wants me. and that is motivating.

~s