Living In The Storm: The Great Exchange

"Even though I walk thru the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for you are with me; your rod and your staff they comfort me!"

Psalm 23:4

It was a gorgeous fall day, unusually warm for November 21st.  We had been holding sweet vigil for 48 hours when Mama's blood pressure and pulse began to rapidly decline. With all of the books I had read, with all the online research I had conducted, no one could have prepared me for the agony of waiting on death. While 55 hours may seem like nothing, when you are holding your breath, pacing hall ways, running to the bathroom quickly in fear you might miss the "moment", and preparing yourself to encounter to the divine transition, it can be more exhausting than you could EVER imagine.

The little I did know about the death process included an idea of giving a person permission to let go.  If you are a mom it might give you some insight into how hard this might have been for our Mom. Moms make sure everything is in it's place, they make sure everyone is where they are suppose to be, they make sure that everyone is doing what they are suppose to be doing. Moms are the nucleus of their families.  And as Mom's room filled with more familiar voices then she had heard in ages, part of me believes she wanted to soak in all the glorious fellowship one more time before a long drought of being without us. The seven of us Hall's had not all been in the same room together since March. Since, things began to down spiral this summer, since, saying goodbye had become imminent. In between the tears we laughed, we told stories, we ate the amazing food the staff at Evergreen tirelessly prepared for us, we giggled about which good looking angel would come and beckon Mom home, we listened to the therapeutic voice of a fisherman read  his favorite fishing story from the Bible, we sang silly children's song because we were too emotional to sing anything serious or spiritual, at one point her room resembled much more of a party then it did a vigil and we were encouraged that mom was hanging around because we were too much fun (in other words we were ssshhh'ed... imagine that :) We held her hands, we brushed her hair, we moistened her dry mouth, we thanked her, we kissed her face, we all told her over and over again that she could go. We made promises to take care of Daddy,  to take care of each other, to raise strong and courageous children just like she had done, and we promised that she would be apart of us as long as we had breath. Hour by hour we walked together thru the valley of the shadow of death, and inch by inch we watched death consume her frail body.

Our family has walked through many, many things together, but I can say that this was the most hallowed ground we had ever walked, and undoubtedly our souls will never be the same because of the journey.

That day I witnessed the great exchange; my Mom's diseased, broken body and mind appeared as if that was all she had to offer on her death bed. But when the sickness was pulled back a heart that believed in Jesus Christ and was consumed by Him was lifted up, and in return she received an inheritance fit for a queen bought by the precious blood of the Lamb. A crowd of thousands and thousands erupted in loud applause as her King ushered her into her eternal home. And a small crowd of a dozen were left on this side of glory with a small taste of the eternal spread all over their hearts.

~Sara