He shook his head slowly, "Sis, I'm so sorry for the mess my generation has passed on to your generation, and unfortunately, now down to my grand kids."
We had covered every topic; relationships, politics, marriage, Islam, parenting, Pope Francis, serving, missions, recollections of the 1970's, the feminist movement, mental health, spiritual health, emotional health and of course how much missed Mama.
Inevitably, we circled back around to where dad and I have spent hours upon hours of treading through meaty conversation; the Church, and mighty war between living faith and the tired traditions of dead faith.
I got all riled up as my voice began to escalate and my hands started flying through the air, whilst my charismatic soul pounded. "My generation dad, is desperate to follow limping leaders. To follow leaders who pass the microphone, to follow someone who says from the pulpit, "I'm limping, your limping, can we limp together?! THIS (as my arms were flailing in all directions around the double-wide) CAN NOT BE ALL THERE IS!
My deep passionate parts are something Dad is 34 years familiar with. After all, he was the first man in my life who chose not to kill off all my passion, but for the safety of my future husband and everyone else in my path, he tried to channel it. Mark thanks you, Dad.
Hands flying, hearts pounding, dreams overflowing like a fountain from my lips, dad gently lowered his head and quietly said, "Kid, you have to remember, my generation does not know how to limp out loud. We weren't allowed."
Those words slowly began to fall all over my heart as I stared at the wall.
How many people are sitting in churches today who are not allowed to limp out loud?
How many people are drenched in suffocating pain, who do not know HOW to limp out loud?
How many people are isolated, alone and walking through paralyzing darkness who have never once considered that others are limping too?
Who have never once heard anyone else admit to limping?
Who have never been given permission to limp?
What if we limped out loud?
What if we taught people to limp out loud?
What if we provided a safe enough space for people to limp out loud without the fear of condemnation and judgement?
What if we determined, RIGHT NOW, in our own homes and our circles of influence, we weren't going to hide our limping any more, but we were going to LIMP OUT LOUD!
Revelation 12, gives us the blue print to triumphing over the devil and the land he tries to claim in our hearts, minds, and lives, "by the blood of the Lamb and the word of our testimony"
THE WORD OF OUR TESTIMONY!
Not the, "I came to know Jesus at 6 years old in Sunday School class, and now I'm good, good, gooder!" testimony.
But the, "oh.my.stars. I am so unbelievably broken and undone. Let me show you my messy" testimony.
How many lives would be changed if leaders, pastors, deacons, elders, Sunday School teachers, mentors, principals, teachers, moms, dads, aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins, friends, family, YOU AND ME, all lower our posture and begin to whisper truth over each other?
Dear 10 Year Old Boy Sitting In The Pew, All Alone In Your Sexual Shame;
You aren't alone in your struggle with sexual temptation! You aren't alone in your addiction to pornography. You aren't alone trapped in the shame of your mind. There are men AND women all around you who are limping, struggling, and depending on the daily bread of grace to see them through. Let us testify to the ways God will shore you up and help you through. Let us create a safe spot for you to come and confess and find forgiveness and healing and encouragement to fight another day. Let us limp with you.
Dear 18 Year Old Girl Who Wants To Kill Herself,
You aren't alone in your self hate and self harm. Many women have gone before you and learned to see themselves as Jesus sees them; pure, undefiled and lovely. Let us slow down enough and come to your side. Let us help you uncover your beauty. Let us offer you hope. Let us limp with you.
Dear Marriage That Is Falling Apart,
You aren't alone. So many couples are hiding their dysfunction in the name of "sticking it out". So much severe silence in our marriages, because no one will admit to their own personal marital limping. When couples are allowed to limp out loud, you will see so many people who can and WILL testify to the miraculous work God has done on their behalf. In the meantime, stifling silence is crushing marriages at their very core. Let us limp with you.
Dear 8 Year Old Little Girl Who Is Being Abused And Tells No One,
You aren't alone. We want to fight for you! We want to rescue you. Along side of Jesus, we want redeem this horror in your life. I know your tiny heart can't believe that all these strong women around you were once the victims of abuse, but they were. Let us limp with you.
Dear Parents Who Feel Like Failures,
You aren't alone. You carry unbelievable guilt for the decisions you made on behalf of your children. You feel at fault for all the bad decisions your children are currently making. You are disappointed in the story you have written on their heart. You are embarrassed, tired and overwhelmed with the task at hand. Let us limp with you.
Dear 35 Year Old Soul, Depressed And Riddled With Anxiety,
You aren't alone. The internal monologue you can't shake, can be quieted when others surround you and share their own depression and anxiety. We want to help strip the lies that are plaguing your mind and show you freedom from your bondage. Let us limp with you.
Dear 70 Year Old Grief Stricken Life,
You aren't alone. You feel like you have no purpose. You feel like you've already lived your best days. You are lonely, sad and weighed down with life-long regret. Let us limp with you.
As long as Satan can keep us silent and isolated,
As long as Satan can convince us we are all alone in our limping; he wins.
He will steal another heart, he will crush another marriage, he will attempt to destroy another soul. He will chew us up and spit us out everyday, all day long. He is constantly seeking to devour us.
WE MUST, by the blood of the Lamb and the word of our testimony, begin to LIMP OUT LOUD!
Oh, it's scary as hell to think of the vulnerability and rawness required to limp out loud. Satan holds us there in fear. Some of us he holds there in captivity for an entire lifetime. But by the blood of the Lamb, He has redeemed us from the pit of despair and we have ALL the power and authority to LIMP OUT LOUD!
I have an idea.
It's a small idea.
One idea that might only see fruition in my small corner of the world.
But it's an idea, nonetheless.
I want to limp out loud.
I believe in my gut, that a wave of sweet, redemptive change will come when we can give ourselves and others permission to limp out loud.
Who wants in?
Who wants to limp out loud?
Who KNOWS deep into their toes, THIS (as my arms flail all over my office) stale diet cannot be all there is to this life?!
In the next few days, I'll be flushing out this small idea here on the blog. Come back. It's getting all kinds of wild.
From one limper to the next!
Here's to a mighty change: #limpoutloud
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