No Praying Here

They must have thought I was a lunatic.

I had, in no uncertain terms, told them that we would not be praying for Aunt Tily's broken hip on Thursday nights.

We ended our first study together and I laid in bed mulling over all the reasons they had for never coming back to this life group. "This wasn't going to work, this community was too complicated to make a group like this work. They live together, work together, eat together, their children go to school together, they go to church together. That women's husband is that girl's boss, and that girl is the boss of that girl's husband....HOLY COW I've made a wrong turn!" :)

Life Group, that in and of itself sometimes puzzles people. Life Group instead of Bible Study? What's the difference?

The difference is we don't pray for Aunt Tily's broken hip.

For as long as I can remember, the Lord has sweetly placed opportunities in my life for me be to apart of a safe group of women to journey with. Since Mark and I married, we have been apart of seven different communities in 12 years. On average, that's a new community every 18 months. It really didn't look like that for us, some communities we were apart of for as long as four years. WHEW! An eternity for us! And some we were apart of for as little as 3 months. Regardless, it was a lot of communities. Consequently, for survival purposes, we developed some of the sweetest communion we have ever had with body of Christ. And we tasted it. We tasted the authenticity and rawness of carrying each other's burdens and brokenness.  And not only did we taste it, we swam in it, we stood under water falls of life giving relationships that mattered. We were free to be ourselves, to be known, REALLY known, and we were given the gift of knowing others. I have said it before, and I will say it again, once you taste it you can never go back.

After walking through the intensity of yet another community change, putting all of our girls in brick and mortar school, and encountering the one year anniversary of my mom's death; my husband in his most gentle and intuitive way said in late December, "maybe it's time to start another women's life group". The man has stood by my side and knows the sacrifice and work that is involved in starting a group like this. It means providing a clean-ish home every Thursday night, overseeing the activity of all four of the kids during the most insane time frame of the day, and most difficult and important; debriefing with me and encouraging me every single step of the way. He astounds me.

And so, in late January, I threw out my fleece, bowed my head before the throne, and said, "have your way with us!"

If you know me even a little bit, you know that I am passionate about prayer. You know that I believe ALL requests should be made known, even when our lips cannot compose the words. I know that our God hears, and sees, and is in our midst. I also have walked in Christian circles my entire life and I know that prayer requests for other people are often used as a means to deflect deeper requests and needs for our OWN hearts and lives. We used to spend hours, thinking we were fooling our bible teacher, making up prayer requests to add to the chalk board as a means of avoiding lecture. She was WAY smarter than that, but indulged our made up prayer requests. Everyone has someone else they can request prayer for. We all do it, we sit in bible studies/churches/prayer meetings, and think about who we are going to mention when it is time for prayer requests to be taken. And there is NOTHING wrong with that. But very few of us are vulnerable enough to ask for prayer for ourselves. Our broken lives, our broken places, our wounded spots. Please do not hear what I am not saying, all prayer is valid. But in a way, when we spend our time requesting prayer for others, we do not let each other in; into the private corridors of our hearts. So I told them, "in order to provide an intentional atmosphere where time is of the utmost importance, we will not be taking prayer requests on the account of others, but only requests that start with 'I need you to pray for ME in this way' "

Lunatic :)

I try to be a very intentional person, especially when it involves the time and lives of other people. And this was the most intentional and raw I could get in meeting numero uno without being voted off the island.

In their braveness (or craziness ;) they returned to the home of the lunatic.

I am so overcome with emotion when I stand back and see what the Lord, in His goodness, is doing on Thursday nights. Every single one of these courageous women are laying down their weapons, their protective armor, and are entering into the water fall of organic sisterhood. (How 1970's, granola-esk, Jesus freak, does that sound? Val would be proud :) Being with them, listening to their stories, watching them laugh, crying with them, and seeing their hearts lived out is the most church-like thing I have done since setting my feet down in French Camp.

My prayer and my desire for this group has been blown out of the water! You cannot fast forward intimacy or community, but you can provide a pathway of intentional bonding. How very much like my God to take my doubts and insecurities and drown them in life giving moments.

Run, do not walk, to find a place in your own neck of the woods to taste the power and deliciousness of loving one another as Christ so gently loves us; even if it means meeting a lunatic :)!

To Thursday Nights Around The Globe!
~Sara